I took a sip of my Vodka Martini, as I tried to listen to my friend trying to figure out what was the “next” step in her “relationship.” Honestly, I was really trying to understand the conversation. “Why does it have to be so confusing?” I asked her.
She looked at me like I had three heads and just landed from Mars which is not unusual. I realized I was treading on a delicate subject; but why do we insist on complicating things and in the process dismantling something “good”.
I sipped again and waived for another knowing this would require multiple martinis.
“Well, things are going well, no?” I smiled. She nodded, “Yes, but…” I interrupted. “You are happy. He is happy. You are getting along.” No need for a “but”; yet she felt the need for an explanation.
“Yes, he is the one, and that’s why it needs to go to the next level. We need to take the next step.” And, here is where I get lost.
What exactly is it that we expect from a relationship? Is being content not enough? We struggle, date, jump through hoops , and are discontent being single until we find “the one”. Then, when we find someone and things are going “great” by relationship standards, we need to push it to the “next” level and it all falls apart.
“ Maybe there is no next level.” I said. Maybe a relationship just is what it is. If it’s going well, why does it have to go anywhere else? If, he is “the one”, then everyone should be satisfied and content with things as they are.
“Maybe he’s not the one?” I smiled. She looked at me and took a huge gulp of her drink, “what do you mean?”
“Hon, if he’s the one, he’ll be there forever. No need to push, rush, or move things to any other level. Love comes in one dimension without levels. It exists because it is real and there is no need for us to make it more than it is. Just enjoy the ride and let the pieces fall as they should.”
I couldn’t help and wonder, though, has our search for “the one” left us with a misconception of love.
Deep!
ReplyDeleteHi Lucy! one of the things that I like about your writing is the simple and idealistic way in which you analyze the world around you. You have not giving up on the childhood dreams and promises we were made.
ReplyDeleteI too was still a believer, a dreamer of fairytales that came true, and of one day finding the one meant for you, the soul that completes you. But you I know that it is not as easy as that. It is always easier to analyze others close to you and even be able to provide good and profound advice, but a lot more difficult to apply it to our own lives.
And by the way, are we not talking about a ‘Girlfriend’, a woman, a female of the species. Why are you even trying to make sense of it …… : )
Lucy, nice Blog, enjoyed the humorous retelling of the original dialog and thanks for sharing your thoughts, as disturbed as they may be from time to time.
Hope all is well.
I have to say, I do funnel my thoughts on my blog... lol... disturbing is putting them mildly. Thanks for reading.
ReplyDeleteI haven't given up on those dreams of long ago. As a matter of fact, they are more vivid than ever. You are right, it is easier to give advise than to take it, but in my case, I do live by my words. =) I'm very different and my personal beliefs are even more so.
You know, Plato believed that the soul evolved from one single point of light that was split in two before making its earthly journey. Our quest here on earth is to find our other half. This is why we live feeling so incomplete. Very few are lucky and find their other half, most just search endlessly without avail.
I believe that if we would put aside all of our earthly distraction, the quest would be simple.
Not based on Plato's believes, but it is how I've always felt. I know my soul has been crying within for the one that completes it. I've have heard the silent screams which echo inside me.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure it we ever really give up, or if we even can, I don't think it's our option. But as you said, we get so distracted by the hustle and bustle of our sorroundings and forget to listen.
thanks Lucy.
Lucy, thanks for taking the time and putting down on a blog your thoughts and inspirations. God's grace to you, sister!
ReplyDeleteGood one Carrie!
ReplyDeleteHumber, thanks so much for your words and thanks for reading.
ReplyDeleteMatt, good to see you on here =) Much peace.